Twins. Nephews.

Around 11pm just now, my sister has given birth her boys. Yes, twins.

Tapi berat dua anaknya masih rentan. Satunya 1,8 kg dan satunya bahkan cuma 1,2 kg.

Keduanya masih di inkubator.

Saya menulis ini di rumah. Info kondisi  rumah sakit dilaporkan langsung sama sepupu-sepupu disana.

I have to take care of my little sisters here. So I couldn’t go there.

Ya Allah. Please. Please. Semoga dua keponakanku bertahan. Kuat. Semoga kakakku diberi kekuatan. Dan bertahan. Aamin.

Terimakasih ya Tuhanku.

RI

A Baby is Nothing But Magic

My sisters was hospitalized. Yes, sisters. One in Makassar, one in Bulukumba- 7 hours driving from Makassar.

Warni, the oldest, is about to give birth her first children. She’s got twins in her belly. I got home hours ago and she’s gone with her husband and our parents. I do pray for her and her children.

And Ayu, younger than me, is in Bulukumba. When I heard the news I called her. All I got to listen is her sigh. She couldn’t even speak one word and asked me to not call her. She was in pain.

Oh Lord.

Give them strength. I am begging please.

RI

Sleep Hard

It’s 12.45 pm and I just woke up. Luckily it is Sunday. I needn’t work. I also don’t have appoinment or something that oblige me to wake up early. I slept after I do Subh pray this morning.

Why did I sleep so hard like this?

Maybe I was too tired.

Yesterday I woke up at 8 am. At 9 am I was in ELC to take the IELTS simulation. At 1 pm I was in office. At 5 pm I was in revius office until 9pm. I slept 12.30 am something.

Until this time.
Sleep hard.

I miss someone call me Sunshine. I miss talking a lot, sharing a lot, writing a lot. About everything. Rindu sampai-sampai kalau terjadi lagi, saya pasti merasa asing. Unknown feeling.

Have a nice weekend everyone!
RI

Words For Mom

Mama adalah perempuan paling hebat yang pernah saya kenal sepanjang hidup saya.

Padahal beliau tidak sarjana. Pendidikannya cuma sampai SMA. Tapi beliau alhamdulillah, berhasil membesarkan enam anak perempuan. Dia mengasuh, menyekolahkan dan mendidik anak-anaknya hingga sarjana. Bahkan dua diantaranya sudah pernah menginjak luar negeri. Alhamdulillah.

Mama bukan cuma menuntut kesempurnaan akademik. Beliau juga keras pada akhlak dan agama.

I am the luckiest girl for having her as mother.

She loves me, unconditionally.

Tapi malam ini Mama bilang seperti ini.

“Mama gak mau berharap lagi sama anak-anak. Lebih banyak kecewanya”,

Dan saya jawab,
“gak ada yang bikin kita kecewa selain memupuk harapan, Ma”,

Mama diam.
Beliau kecewa karena kasih sayangnya pada anaknya tak berbalas sesuai apa yang diharapkannya.

Taruhlah harapanmu pada Yang Maha Satu. Allah SWT.

Makassar, 2014.
Disaat udah mau tidur tapi tak bisa. Badan meriang dan suara hampir hilang.

Tell Me What is the Best Way to Declare Our Love

Tell me something I am dying want to know.
What is the best way to declare our love to someone we care?

Is it enough to ask them on a typical meeting, in the best place we could imagine. And at the best moment we directly say, “I love you, you know”
Or maybe “hey, I think I’m in love with you”
Or “what do you think about an idea of we go on a date?”
Or we tell a long story about how we end up fall in love with them.

And what if they say,
“Sorry, I am afraid we can’t be together as a couple”,
“No, you have misunderstood about you and me”,
“Sorry, I have girlfriend”,

How can we face that kind of reactions?
How can we hold the tears to stream down our face?
How can we fake our smile, our laugh, to pretend that our feeling is okay after rejection?

Yeah, hold still. Don’t say it if you are too afraid, too worry. Don’t declare your feeling.

But then, how can you know whether she or he has the same feeling with you or not?

Nothing haunts us like the things we don’t say. Right?

But what is the best way?

Sunshine
Makassar, 2014

While We’re Lost in Space

Akhirnya ada waktu lanjutin baca bukunya Maggie Tiojakin berjudul Selama Kita Tersesat di Luar Angkasa- While We’re Lost in Space. Kumcer gitu. Aku baru baca dua cerpen dan menurutku, “gila keren banget”.

Beberapa bulan belakangan, sejak aku kenal Aldiko-salah satu app buat baca e-book di phone, aku makin rajin baca.

Berikut adalah buku-buku yang aku baca:
1. Seperti Dendam Rindu Harus Dibayar Tuntas (completed)
2. Fifty Shades of Grey (completed)
3. Fifty Shades Darker (in progress)
4. The First Phone Call from Heaven (in progress)
5. An Abundance of Katherine (in progress)

Kemarin aku juga udah nonton Divergent nya Veronica Roth. It was amazing! Jadinya aku mau baca Insurgent dan lanjutannya.

Sunshine