I got an offer to work out of town, to be an editor in a national media. It excited me, really. However, unfortunately I said no.
I can’t leave Makassar again. I don’t want to.
Years ago, I wanted to go out from this city so much. Every place somehow reminded me of the memories I want to forget.
But then I came back and I met Akbar and I turned to love this city so much. My family is here either. My Mom also forbids me to leave home before I get marry.
I start to make beautiful memories here and make it as homey as I could.
Ah, anyway, I am going to teach again on Monday! It’s a small office in Haji Bau Street, near Wisma Kalla. Different challenge, different place.
Allah knows best.
Since I moved back to my old centre, I have this kind of uncomfortable situation.
That makes me feel “oh, I want to end this soon”, everytime I sit down and start my work.
I want to go away. I need some escape.
Or is it possible I am just having bored?
And it will be passed as time goes by?
Oh, I had to hurry. I am already late working.
So I am officially no longer as a daily reporter. I moved to weekly desk called Dialog Jumat.
Rasanya jomplang banget. Dari Jakarta Utara yang keras, harsh, tiba-tiba dipindahin ke desk yang ngurusin Majelis Ta’lim, pengajian, komunitas dan agenda keislaman, narasumber kebanyakan ustadz.
Rina udah di Bandung, Desi di Semarang, Lida juga udah jarang ikut rapat Jumat. Saya pun akhirnya pindah. Masing-masing akhirnya gak ketemu, setelah beberapa lama kompaknya bukan main.
I miss them so much, when we were still hanging around together. Sleepover, plan an escape…
Saya tidak nyaman dengan keadaan ini, tapi saya menolak untuk membenci. Perasaan benci itu memakan semangat dan pikiran rasional kita dari dalam. Benci itu mempersempit pikiran dan saya tidak mau hal itu terjadi. Saya tahu ada sesuatu di balik semua ini.
Allah knows best while we don’t. So, saya memasrahkan semuanya.